It's ok to take care of me

There comes a time in life where we have to make decisions that are hard. Decisions you wish you were never given to make. The difference now is, I take them all to God. I ask, or plead with Jesus to help me.

1 Chronicles 16:10-11 Glory in his holy name;
   let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.
Look to the LORD and his strength;
   seek his face always.

I do not know the path that I will choose- I just know I have heard clearly from Him that I need to work on healing. A lot has happened to me in my life & I am finally realizing that my body is His temple. If I am to honor God- to minister to others, I need to prepare myself. This means I need to learn to forgive- and then work through the process of how to move on. Our ways are not His ways- Wow that's hard to accept!  It has never been more evident of this,  than in my life right now. I realize that trials come & they are so very painful. However- the feeling of closeness with God and the relationship you develop is part of His plan.

I know now, I am not responsible for the actions, words or feelings of others. I can not change another human being. All I can do is pray for them & lift them up to our Father. My pastor once stated, "If the Holy Spirit can not change them, you can't". It is so true. I hope through my prayers we all come to our knees & fully accept God, live for God & not of this world or worldly things I call "stuff". It is not for me to own the decisions of others- nor is it for me to judge their actions. There is only one judge & that is Jesus. I am only responsible for me & leading my children.

I do not know what tomorrow brings- or how I will get there. I am a mess. That is hard to say. What I do know is that if the good Lord brought me to it, He will bring me through it. He has blessed me with the best husband and children a wife-or a mom could ask for, or even feel like I deserve. I love you Charles with all my heart & soul and THANK YOU for loving me "for better or worse, for richer for poorer". You have made God proud- You honor Him, you honor your vows and you honor me ( as Christ loved the church).  It's strange when you actually "get" the old saying ~ We may not have it all together, but together we have it all~.

There are people in my life who give me wings- who lift me & support me when I do not know where to go. They remind me that it is ok to be where I am today. I am so very thankful for each of you. You all know who you are.  I am weak, I am humble & I am loosing my prideful ways. I will be okay because God says I am His.
~Dear Lord please rebuild me & guide me on the path You want me to go. I am Yours. Help me know where to go next, what to say & how to get there. Thank you for dying for me & rescuing me from myself. I am a complete mess without you.. Love- Your child